15 Reasons Why You Should Date a Physicist

Yes, you read it right. You can and should date a physicist because they are the most boring awesome people you will ever meet. But first, let us set-up the mood by quoting the most famous physicist – ME Albert Einstein.

       It is a common misunderstanding that us, physicist (yeah, I’m one of them), are boring to be with. You always get sleepy when he starts those boring conversations, nerd talks and starts to use words you never knew existed until you read it in Young and Freedman’s University Physics 13th edition. But hey, not all people are perfect so here are the 15 reasons why you should date a physicist:

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15. He is a scientist

Have you experienced being courted using the scientific method? Well if not, you are in for a ride of the lifetime. Imagine a well researched dates, gifts and surprised anniversary celebrations. Additionally, nothing can go wrong from a move based in science.

14. The not so common pick-up lines

 “Are you gravity? because I can’t stop myself from falling into you.”

Heard this line? You will certainly fall 9.8 meters per second per second and he will always be there with a trampoline to catch you. How romantic.

13. Master of the Right Hand Rule

12. The only one in his heart

Pauli’s exclusion principle. It’s all that simple! No two women can be queens of his heart simultaneously.

11. He believes that no one is perfect

He is friends with systematic errors, random errors, error propagation, variance, standard deviation, he won’t even get MAD! Get it? MAD? Mean Absolute Deviation.

10.  Considers every possibilities

 Not considering every possibilities is, and I quote the famous line of my Calculus professor, “…a mortal sin”  in the field of science specially in physics. To give you a proof of that, we even have a cat that is alive and dead at the same time.

9. Problems? Worry no more.

If he can deal with the uncertainties of the quantum world, there’s no reason he can’t deal with yours!

8. Genuine Beauty!

When he says you’re the most beautiful, he is comparing you to the most elegant equation of nature thing that ever existed – the Universe. If you’re still not impressed, better find another parallel universe…

7. Become the centre of the universe

If ordinary people can make you the centre of their world, he can make you the centre of the whole Universe. He has the power to choose his own coordinate system.

6. Will always return the favour

Newton’s 3rd Law states that “In every action there is always an equal and opposite reaction”. If you’re attracted to him, he is attracted to you. If you love him he will love you back equally.

5. He never cheats

He knows that a system of 3 bodies is very difficult to solve and that the solution will always lead to chaos.

4. Big Bang is REAL

The Universe started with a bang – that’s what the Big Bang theory in your high school texts told you. Having doubts? He can prove to you that Big Bang is not just a theory. 😉

“Bang, Bang, Bangity Bang! I said Bang, Bang, Bangity Bang!”

3. Time dilates when you’re with him

Time slows down when you travel faster than the speed of light, but when you’re with him, you don’t need to travel fast – time will just slow down for you.

2. He is good at optimizing

Many problems in physics involve a lot of optimization, least action, efficiency etc. He is an expert in maximizing both of your time, money, effort and fun.

1.  He is still a normal person capable of love

Finally, like any other persons you have met,he is a normal person who also can love and be loved. I mean, is it true that everyone is equal when it comes to love? So why not let him show you how special you are because, like every phenomenon that occur in the realm of science, nothing happens for no reason.

What other characteristics of a physicist have we missed? Comment below. 😉

– hannibal, Vlad

featured image:

1. “science-love” (http://www.24frameslater.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/science-love.jpg, accessed: November 25, 2014)